If I’m going to be schlepping around all day in the t-shirt I slept in, you can be damn sure I have some fancy drawers on underneath.
A lot of people poo poo Victoria’s Secret. I love them because they are within my price range (send me crazy coupons all the time) and carry my size – 34DD (which is probably a DDD right now, with the extra weight I’ve gained) and they don’t look like grandma bras. I take really good care of my bras so once a year, usually after Christmas when everything is on sale, I stock up on the basic black and nude bras and add some new colors to the mix.
With a large chest, I have always avoided padded bras. Seriously, what’s the point? I really do like the Biofit bras from VS though. The gimmick is that different cup sizes have varying levels of lift at the very bottom. DD has the least amount but it’s enough to keep the underside of my boobs from making any contact with the skin below. I am in constant fear of eventual sagging and stretch marks and am proud to say these puppies are still perky.
I went ahead and tried their new Biofit push-up. Whoa nelly! I love them! I got the dark purple lace and charcoal satin.
I also like to get more than one pair of panties in matching colors, since I wash my bras less frequently. You can usually find some lacey ones and basic cotton from the same dye lot, and even prints in the sale bin that coordinate.
Buying lingerie is torture for me. I’m not talking about basic bras and panties. That’s no big deal. I know which basics fit at Victoria’s Secret and don’t even need to try anything on. Beautiful statement lingerie is hell. First off, I’m small but busty. I’m not going to get so personal as to reveal my bra size but lets just say I’m lucky I can even get a few bras at VS. It’s really pretty ridiculous. I’m a small down below and a large up top. This does not average out to a medium.
After Oprah did that big deal show where it was revealed that the majority of women wear the wrong sized bra, I took myself to get properly measured. There are a few different ways of measuring for a proper fit and well, I guess I had been shuffling the wrong set of numbers. I had been squeezing myself into 36Cs for years, underwire digging into my sides, and every time I leaned over, something popped out. Well, when the woman whipped her tape measure only under my armpits and told me the cold hard truth, I burst out laughing so loudly – from both disbelief and utter embarrassment. What? Are you kidding me? She handed me some to try on, betting her life she was right. I couldn’t believe it! I was forever doomed and could no longer live in denial in my ill-fitting but beautiful undies.
When you know the truth and finally feel true comfort for the first time since you hit puberty, you never look back at those too small torture devices. I spent a fortune on a whole new wardrobe of comfy well-fitted bras but was saddened to give away my huge collection of (gorgeous) but painful harnesses.
Well, when your size is on the edge of obnoxious, you walk a fine line when it comes to affordable but attractive bras. Things begin to get foggy in the bra design world and you have to dig through wide straps, 4-hook granny bras, and strange paneled contraptions that look like quilts on your tatas. Department store bras are out of the question and you’re stuck with VS and and over-priced specialty boutiques.
God help you if you ever want to wear a one-piece negligee. The top fits and the bottom is huge, or the bottom fits and you’re popping out the top in a very unattractive way. While these articles of clothing aren’t suposed to stay on for very long, you would like to at least make a roaring first impression. Rarely will I ever find a one-piece with the proper cup size that doesn’t have an enormous ass attached. Matching novelty sets are always a problem too as they rarely let you mix and match sizes. (Don’t get me started on swimsuits and adjustable ties, or even dresses for that matter.) Anything pretty, seasonal, cottony, lacey or fun is rarely ever in my size and when I finally do find the rare thing that works, I’m on it with a quickness… a fierceness!
How I would love to wear something reminiscent of La Perla or Kiki de Montparnasse… or even Puimond or Atsuko Kudo… oh… so… very… shiny! growl!
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