Lara

+ & -

by Lara on August 9, 2010

in + & -

 

 

 

 

 

  • I’m seriously thinking about buying a foreclosure home. Not now (maybe in a few years) but I’m researching FHA loans and the entire process. It’s a serious long-term goal I’m setting for myself. It’s too far off for the bf to panic but my parents are being super supportive. Considering my mom was a real estate agent & FHA inspector and my father owns a construction company, I have access to tools, discounted supplies, advice and help. We’re a land investment type of family. I’ve stepped up my game on saving up for a down payment. I’m getting my ducks in a row all Suze Orman style over here! Whether we’d like to live in the home or flip it after some fixing up, this will all be based on situation, location and the state of the property (and the economy) upon purchase. At this point, it’s all about patience, saving up and research. Scary exciting stuff!
  • I finally went to the South of the James Farmer’s Market. I am in love with that place and so glad it’s going on until December 4th! I bought grass-fed beef from a local farmer for cheaper than at the grocery store. (It comes frozen and sealed so you can make it back home safely.) We bought beautiful heirloom cherry tomatoes, cucumbers, blackberries, and had tacos and breakfast burritos. I’m getting flowers, bread and more next time! Perfect way to throw together a special weekend dinner and get yourself out of the house on a Saturday morning. Here’s a Flickr pool of Richmond farmer’s market photos.
  • This particular comic is wonderful! It compares Orwell and Huxley’s fears for our future. Yeah, we’re screwed.

  • For all you suckers out there (I’m one of them), aren’t these lipsticks adorable? Of course, after a few uses, they’ve lost their charm but good grief! So cute! $25 each here. (via and all over the web now because us suckers for cute… we are legion)

  • Oh hey! Did you notice I changed the look of my + & – posts? No big deal but I think it’s simple and cute!
  • This post from DI$COUNT about what luxury is to them… yes.
  • This entry from Postcards from Yo Mamma. Seriously, why? It happens to me all the time.

  • The bf went out of town two weekends ago. While he was gone, I picked up a box of his favorite chocolates. He brought me back French tarts from a bakery we love in Maryland. This is why I have my next entry in the minuses…

 

  • I don’t own a scale and judge my weight by my jeans. There’s no denying they’ve been a bit snug lately but the cold hard truth hurts. I went to the doctor 2 weeks ago and got weighed. I’m back to the most I ever weighed, about 2 years ago- 128lbs. Two years ago it was sitting on my ass drinking beer. This time, I barely drink, and it’s from sitting on my ass and bad food choices. This may not be a big deal to some of you but it’s kind of a big deal to me. I like the way I feel and look when I’m around 120. My body does not like this extra weight. My skin changes. I physically feel like yuck. I’m only 5’1″ and it means that if I don’t reign it in, I have to buy new clothes and I am NOT buying a new wardrobe because of laziness and shoving cheese in my face. Things have gotten real around here in the food department. It’s salad time but, I hate the gym. Hate it. I would rather all that sweat and effort have some instant results so, hard labor is more my style. Yard work, psychotic cleaning, etc. It’s on.
  • We had a big rainstorm on Thursday and on the sofa, while I was being a dork on my laptop and the bf was being a dork on his Xbox, we heard a loud pop. The bf saw a flash of light and the TV cut off then back on. We sat stunned for a second wtf-ing a lot and then ran to check it out. Water. From the ceiling. Leaking. On the 50″ plasma TV the bf bought himself after his tax refund. His baby. Fuck. It’s still working but of course something has been fried. How crucial? No clue. Thank god for renter’s insurance. I’m gonna make a call on Monday and see what we need to do. Oh, and the landlord needs to fix that leak.

{ 2 comments }

age

by Lara on August 6, 2010

in fashion

There’s been a lot of talk about age on the fashion blogs lately and it hasn’t been good. One post that really upset me was from the ladies of Kingdom of Style. They had to make the shared decision of declining the inclusion of an already completed interview for Look Magazine. The staff decided one of these stylish ladies was too old. She’s 44. Read their take on it here. 

One thing I’ve never really liked about fashion magazines are those sections where they tell you what’s appropriate for certain age groups. It’s usually broken down into the 20s, 30s, 40s, and everything after ago 50 gets thrown into an abyss. I usually find myself liking all of the outfits. I mean, certain things are appropriate for certain occasions. I wouldn’t wear the same thing in a professional setting as I would to get drinks with a girlfriend. I also don’t expect a 60-year-old woman to feel the need to cover her neck Murphy Brown style all the time. Really, who the hell is going to tell Tina Turner she’s too old for mini skirts?! I think if you’ve got it, flaunt it. Hell, if you don’t have it… wear whatever you think you look great in, whatever makes you feel wonderful.

Are you going to tell her she’s too old to wear that?

Here’s a link from InStyle magazine with some of their age tips. Total crap if you ask me. For 50s+ they say:

With age comes the authority to wear polished clothes that younger women often can’t pull off, like pencil skirts and embellished button-down shirts.

Well, I certainly didn’t know young women usually can’t pull off polished clothing and I didn’t know women in their 50s were somehow, magically, fashion authorities.

Vogue’s August issue is all about age. I enjoyed a few articles and it’s always interesting to read about fascinating successful women but, this imagined relationship between age and style is beyond me. Sure, older women have seen most of the styles come, go, and come back again. Younger women reinterpret the older styles but so do older women. Not every older woman is clinging onto her classics because she’s so much wiser and sophisticated. Not every woman in her 20s wants to look like the personification of a flirt. I thought all of this fluffy fashion stuff was about art, creativity, feeling your best, and having some fun!

I think all of us at any age, are capable of being presented with new fashion and interesting styling tips and being able to figure out what would work best for our lifestyles, tastes and our willingness to try something new. We don’t need the numbers of age attached to any of it.

I can be a bit of an ass on here at times about finding certain things in fashion atrocious. That’s just my personal taste and I like to joke about it but; I swear to all that’s holy, if I start sounding like some ageist asshole, please let me know.

{ 0 comments }

hello sailor!

by Lara on August 6, 2010

in photo friday

This is one of my mom’s boyfriends during the Vietnam era. I believe he even proposed. I figure you ladies wouldn’t mind checking him out!

Have a great weekend!

 

{ 1 comment }

personality tests

by Lara on August 4, 2010

in geek

I hate when those personality tests are spot on! How dare they!? They don’t know me!

A friend of mine shared the results of a personality test that I hadn’t heard of before called the RHETI test. I already knew I was an ENTJ (sometimes ESTJ) based on the MBTI test. Being a psych major, I eat this stuff up.

Some keywords for ENTJ/ESTJ are:

decisive, fearless, planner, engaged, social, self centered, comfortable around others, image conscious, likes to be center of attention, adventurous, outgoing, emotionally stable, leader, ambitious, hard working, dominant, prepared, hates to be bored, confident, opinionated, analytical, prepares for worst case scenarios, organized, orderly, clean, driven, resourceful, finishes most things they start, achieving, risk taker, narcissistic, arrogant, perfectionist, academic, scientific, critical, avoids giving in to others, does not like to compromise, skeptical, focused, conventional, planner, realistic, responsible, norm following, respects authority, punctual, hard working, stiff, follows the rules, content, normal, strict, disciplined, aggressive, assertive, content, happy, proper, formal, strict with self, meticulous, strong sense of purpose

For better and for worse, all of this is true about me. (I hate the “arrogant” part.)

So, here’s what my friend’s new [to me] test showed:

I’m mainly a type 2 with some 1 & 8 sprinkled in. Click on the numbers and all of it is true as well.

Crazy crazy stuff but definitely a bit more accurate than stupid stupid astrology.

{ 4 comments }

body images

by Lara on August 3, 2010

in beauty

Mischief Champion

Of course we’re not the only culture that’s concerned with body image. Growing up, on documentaries and in your grandpa’s old National Geographic magazines, you saw the women whose necks were stretched with brass coils, the stretched lips and ear lobes, sharpened teeth, the intricately tattooed children. Those practices have been passed down in cultures for centuries. I feel that most of these techniques are rooted much deeper than in the superficial. They are culturally bonding, and are rites of passage and inclusion into adulthood.  

In our culture we’ve seen endless plastic surgeries and invasive procedures to preserve our youth. The myriad of simple things we do on a daily basis are to meet up to a certain standard of beauty. My mother taught me how to be a “woman” by showing me how to dress for the occasion, apply makeup, shave my legs… the girlie stuff expected of a lady. I just can’t help but think most of these practices stem more from insecurities and a pressure to measure up than any spiritually bonding ritual (although all that stuff with mom and pedicures with your girlfriends certainly can be a bonding experience).

It wasn’t until I was a teenager and buying those fascinating Japanese fashion magazines, that I saw entirely different types of pressures other women of modern industrialized countries have to endure. I saw that their body issues were a bit different from ours. Where we want flat tummies, they passionately want more narrow ankles and calves. They are also pressured to look Western. This honestly breaks my heart. The thought of wanting to remove the essence of your ethnic identity, to be ashamed of that, hurts. In the backs of those magazines are tons of ads for products promising paler skin, surgeries to remove the essential Asian-ess from their eyes,  dental procedures galore, and I just saw this on eBay, which prompted me writing this post in the first place. It is a clip to make wider noses more narrow.

This is ridiculous right? Well, it’s not any more ridiculous than the mess us Westerners put ourselves through physically and emotionally.

My father is Serbian and my mom is essentially a WASPy mutt. My entire life, I have been insecure about my nose, which I inherited from my dad. My dark hair, dark eyes and my anything-but-a-button nose are my Serbian parts. I’ve really been put through the ringer over it. Let’s just say that children are cruel and so are adults. It has been difficult to look at myself sometimes when I’m having a body dysmorphic disorder-style ”bad nose day”. This is infuriating and irrational because this has become my reality simply because others have made it so. It’s soooo unfair. If I went to Serbia, Greece, Turkey or Italy, I would blend right in so I know I’m not some anomaly. Part of growing up and fostering your self-esteem is to learn to love yourself, lumps and all, regardless of other’s opinions/ignorance. I will never remove that part of my ethnic identity and I truly wish we all could just start accepting and loving all the things that make us unique. Love what you have inherited. Those Irish freckles, that short torso from your grandma, your dad’s cute stubby toes, those wider set eyes, muscular calves, unruly hair, hips a hawt belly dancer would kill for… I promise that for everything you dislike about yourself, there are a ton of people who admire it and wish they had that quality. I’m still trying to remind myself of this every day.

my profile in its full glory

I recently read this post about the implications of simply saying “I’m so fat”. Check it out. It can apply to a lot of our insecurities.

{ 8 comments }

costume jewelry

by Lara on August 2, 2010

in fashion

Who doesn’t love junk jewelry? My collection has grown to mammoth proportions. I recently sold my jewelry armoire because it didn’t go with our decor (and was quite heavy and cumbersome) so, I had to empty and sort everything out. Thank god for those Sephora drawstring gift bags. I have a small box with daily things (overflowing) and a big bag full of little bags shoved on a shelf in my closet.

One major problem I have with cheap costume jewelry is how it doesn’t stand up to wear and time. Tarnishing is the worst offender. I’ve tried the jewelry cleaning solutions but it works most effectively on precious metals. Even if I’m only spending $5 on a bracelet, I don’t want to end up having to toss if after it’s become a staple in my wardrobe. Of course there are different levels of costume jewelry with longer lasting finishes but, I can’t bring myself to spend $100 on a cuff so, I’m just going to focus on the super cheap thrills in this post.

My strategy for the past few years has been to carefully avoid the shiny stuff. Shiny silver and gold finishes inevitably get this funky haze on it that nothing can get rid of (unless you know of a miracle cleaner out there, let me know).

I try to stick with wood, painted/enameled pieces (they chip though), antiqued finishes, beads, lucite, matte, and darker finishes. Pendant chains can easily be replaced if they start getting nastay. This bracelet here, I would totally avoid.

Also, junk jewelry with imbedded rhinestones and pearls aren’t going to last long either. I don’t know how many things I’ve bought that soon had missing stones before I learned my lesson about daily wear. This type of jewelry is off my radar now as well, unless I only wear it on special occassions.

This necklace from Charlotte Russe has a dark metal finish that won’t get compromised by age. I just bought this and love it!

This cuff, also from CR, has a dull antiqued finish that shouldn’t get that haze.

This enameled cuff is so much fun, but it has the shiny edges. I save those moisture-absorbing desiccant pouches that come in shoe boxes and keep them with my jewelry. There may be hope for this but I still didn’t get it. Also, no one sees the insides of bracelets.

What’s your favorite costume jewelry piece? Do you simply have to get the shiny and just toss after they start feeling the funk?

{ 2 comments }

on free hosting sites and blogging

by Lara on July 31, 2010

in geek

UPDATE:: Not even an hour after I posted this, I finally got a real response from my last message to WordPress from what actually sounded like a human being! What needed to be fixed was fixed and I now have access to my domain! I also received an email from the super nice guy who also left a comment here. He gave me some extra info and was really understanding. I have updated this post so many times, softening some of my anger because my particular problem was certainly unique and does not apply to the overall use of WordPress.com, which I have really enjoyed up until this point. I still hold firm to my upset over the fact that many messages to them were not truly read and addressed until I got ugly with them. Unfortunately raising some hell has been the only way I get any real customer service these days.

Now, I have to go through the process of transferring and waiting and moving everything over. Wish me luck!

******

If you follow my tweets you’ll know the hell I’ve been experiencing for over a week now. Okay, I’m going to go on a bit of a tangent here and maybe you will learn something for your own blogging experience. (Maybe I’ll get some goddamn help if someone on WordPress sees this.)

First off to explain a bit, WordPress.com and WordPress.org are two totally different things. WordPress.org is pretty much the free interface/program/software/whatever that people upload to their own webhost to make blog writing easier. It’s the nice and neat template. WordPress.com is the site where you can use that same template and also blog for free. They host your blog w/out charging you (like Blogger and all the other free blogging sites out there, although I do think Blogger allows ads.) Your blog’s web address will be blahblah.wordpress.com unless you pay them for your own domain without the wordpress part at the end. I purchased mymilkglassheart.com for a year from WordPress.com.

What I didn’t know upon starting this blog almost 2 years ago was 1) if I would stick with it 2) if anyone would read it 3) you can’t have paid ads on WordPress.com 4) you can’t upload cool plugins on WordPress.com. Now that I have stuck with it and actually have readers and opportunities to get some ads up in here, I realized I needed to switch all of my content over to a new host to make some monies off my hard work.

So I cancelled my domain with WordPress (going back to mymilkglassheart.wordpress.com) thinking I would then just register my domain with Bluehost, where I was moving to. Only problem, my domain doesn’t expire for a few more months and WordPress.com was still redirecting to my blog if you tried to go to mymilkglassheart.com. Essentially, my domain was in limbo but I couldn’t access it or transfer it. This is a unique situation and none of their support addressed this problem.

Let’s just talk about WordPress.com’s support. IT SUCKS! There are no phone numbers or direct email addresses. You go to their support section, try to figure out your problem with info they’ve already provided and then, as a last resort, you send a message through a form. These messages I sent apparently went to illiterate robots who (eventually) sent me worthless links to their support forums that didn’t help, even though I told them that the support forums didn’t cover my concerns, and that the buttons they said should be on my control panel/dashboard didn’t exist.

Upon further investigation and a phone call to wonderful, competent, helpful 24-7/365 1-800# Bluehost, trying to figure all this crap out when things I tried to do just wouldn’t work, I found out that when you buy a domain from WordPress, they use a third-party. They don’t tell you this. I also found out through Bluehost that my domain was managed by Wild West Domains. I looked them up and called, hoping to circumvent WordPress. They also have excellent customer service and reinstated the [limited] access to my domain on WordPress after I had cancelled. I hoped that would help but it didn’t. Still, the access Iwas supposed to have to my domain on WordPress.com, this access they said wad supposed to be available (with screenshots and everything) on their support forums DID NOT EXIST!

I needed my EPP Authorization Code to transfer my domain to Bluehost. An EPP Authorization Code is essentially the SS# to your domain. It allows you to take it anywhere you want. Apparently there have been many complaints online about hosts holding them hostage. Think of it like this: Pepsi registers the domain Pepsi.com. Like a patent, this domain will eventually expire and unless their people keep on top of this, someone else can come along, buy it and then Pepsi will have to buy it back from them at whatever price. Hosts have total access to expiration dates and times. They can swipe up expiring domains like a vulture at a patent office. Honestly, no one wants my stupid domain. It’s just become dirty policy to hold the EPP codes hostage.

It is a good idea when purchasing a domain to get your EPP Code right off the bat and store it somewhere safely. You may have serious issues with your host and need to transfer. It’s also your RIGHT to have it. You paid for your domain. You own it. You should have all information regarding it.

So I am now patiently waiting for a god damn human being to contact me from WordPress to give me what I need. I have sent another message to them through their form without any direct keywords. Their bots have essentially ignored it. I have also had the exact same bullshit responses from their Twitter account.

Here’s my last killer message to them:

This is the 4th time I have contacted support with a serious issue I need to have resolved in a timely manner. I have received two automatic responses with links that are worthless to me. If someone had actually read my complaints/problems they clearly would not have sent the support forum links that do not answer my questions.

I have never experienced such terrible support in my life. I would appreciate an email from a REAL human being who will help me with the issue I am having that CANNOT be addressed by any of the support options available. Believe me, I have looked and exhausted all other options.

If I don’t receive real help in regards to obtaining the access and rights to something I have paid you for, I will have no other choice but to file a formal complaint with InterNIC.

Sincerely,
Lara

If I don’t get the help I need soon, I am going to hunt high and low for any corporate contact information and I will hound those bastards like you would not believe. I also plan on filing a complaint with InterNIC. In tweeting about my issues, I got a response from a guy telling me it took him 6 months to get access to his own domain, that he paid for from Lycos. He called every extension in their office until someone finally helped him. This is not an isolated problem.

So my advice to you lovely bloggers out there… if you are serious about making something bigger out of your blog, if you want control of your own work and domain, want to control the appearance and add-ons of your blog, and maybe you would even eventually like to get paid advertising on your blog,  get the hell off the free sites. They are perfectly fine for the casual blogger, like I started off as. If your readership begins to get larger and you are committed to delivering consistent content, go ahead and pay for hosting from whatever service offers you the server storage space you need, and whatever other features sound good to you. Look for 99.9% up times. Look for good reviews and 24-7 customer service. Ask around. Get recommendations. Go ahead and upload the WordPress software to your host site. It’s excellent. Just stay off the free hosting sites. Also register your domain with a reputable registry site and get that EPP code immediately.

Also, if you can offer any advice about my current issue, I would greatly appreciate it! If nothing happens, I’m stuck here until my domain expires. I’ll be damned if I’m ordering new MOO cards!

PS: Save your snarky comments about how I should’ve hired a web developer. Seriously? I guess I should hire a publisher to handle my photo albums. Poor access to customer service is a bad thing. So is being uncooperative and withholding access to someone’s  information by sending them worthless help. I’m a do-it-yourself kind of gal. There’s no way in hell I’d hand this blog over to some cornhole playing internet bro who knows how to do things that I’m perfectly capable of teaching myself over time. I change my own tires, remove my own stitches, and I think I can figure this elementary crap out, if companies would just offer better service.

{ 2 comments }

leash

by Lara on July 30, 2010

in photo friday

It’s almost midnight and I’m finally managing to squeeze in a pic for Friday. This week has just about ruined me. The weekend isn’t looking any better. Here’s to hoping you have a swell time! I want to walk a kitten on a leash.

source unknown

{ 0 comments }

+ & -

by Lara on July 29, 2010

in + & -

 

 

  • Yup. This is pretty much me every night.

  • Marie of Agent Lover’s hilarious post on the evils of Target is so true. So true. Purge your soul and leave a comment.
  • I drew detailed pictures in pencil for about 20 years of my life and suddenly quit. These drawings by Marissa Textor are blowing my mind.

  • What a great DIY project!

via

 

  • Commercials where people talk with their mouths full really gross me out. Hardees (also called Carls Jr.) is the worst offender.

  • Inception = meh
  • Do we really need to talk about this disgusting heat? I love summer but come the hell on!

  • Online, I’m definitely of the “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all” school. Except here (on MY blog), where I have given myself a chance to get some things off my chest. Sometimes these things are silly, sometimes serious. Only once here have I specifically directed any spite/jealousy towards a very young (in my opinion, over-hyped) fashion blogger. IFB has a post about fashion bloggers being cruel to their peers. It’s an interesting read with a lot of interesting comments. Only once has someone directly insulted me in my comments. I was told I was “a little too old” to opine that crop tops are unattractive. Also for good measure, the teenage guy (yes, a boy) added that I should go ahead and get a nose job. Wow! Never heard that one before! Anyhow… it didn’t bother me. I find that most people are of the sucking variety and when you put yourself out there online, it’s bound to attract assholes. We all need to get used to it and screen our comments. I enjoy the blogs that simply exist to be mean. Go Fug Yourself has a HUGE following. Those women are hilarious. Oh, and Goddammit, I’m Mad! is my absolute favorite. Let’s admit this simple math: most women dress for other women + women are catty = there will be pain. Here’s a good post on blogger etiquette.

{ 2 comments }

goat hair

by Lara on July 28, 2010

in fashion

All this goat hair is creeping me out.

{ 3 comments }

← Previous Entries

Next Entries →